Fred the Full-back went to his optician and asked for a new pair of spectacles. 'I broke my last pair in an accident,' he said.
'What sort of an accident?' asked the optician. 'You don't wear your glasses when you're playing, surely?'
'No,' said Fred. 'You see, I was kissing my girlfriend and . . .'
'How could you break your glasses kissing your girlfriend ?' said the optician.
'Well,' said Fred. 'She crossed her legs.'
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